Flag Alert

As a non-drinker attending a close family member’s hen party a few months ago in a busy city centre I was already feeling anxious at the reality of having to spend the next few hours cradling a mocktail or other soft drink whilst surrounded by alcohol drinkers necking as much booze as possible as if it was going off the market tomorrow, (what a thought eh)...  I was going into an environment where there would undoubtedly be lots of drinks, music, noise, games etc. – that is daunting on its own but that’s not my issue here. 

 

We were a group of about 12 or so girls out in town ready for some fun and giggles.  The venue was one that offered bottomless brunch where drinks are brought to your table as quickly as you can drink them for the period of time allocated.  Quickly we placed our food and drinks order and carried on the banter.  Well can you imagine my face when 12 drinks arrive at our table and one drink is sporting a bright yellow, triangular flag with the words “Non Alc” written on it?  In an already heightened state, this just exacerbated my anxious feelings and has ultimately led to this ramble.  I mean, why not add some flashing lights to the glass just for good measure!

 

This has made me question the whole idea of putting flags in non-alcoholic drinks.  Obviously I know why it is done, it is so everyone is shown that you are the odd one out because you aren’t taking part in the fun and laughter and you are more than likely going to be the first one to make an excuse and leave the party so that everyone else can start to enjoy themselves without the fun police staring on disapprovingly.  It’s also a warning to those who walk the room looking to pilfer the odd free drink from a table whilst no one’s looking – well you can’t blame them with today’s prices can you?  The good old “Non Alc” flag screams, “Whoa mate don’t touch this drink, its pure party pooper juice in a glass right there, you don’t wanna be one of them”. 

 

No, the flag is to show that there’s a difference between my drink and yours, we are stereotyped into a certain category but instead of ousting the non-drinkers shouldn’t it be suggested that those who are consuming alcohol should get their drinks branded with a flag or a different coloured straw as they are the ones that we need to watch out for 3 or 4 gins later, they are the ones that will get lairy and start telling the same story over and over and…. They are the ones that lose all sense of meaning from their mouths and all control of their legs, not those of us who may be on call, or preggers or, god forbid, simply just do not want to pickle our livers.  For every drink "they" consume they should get the branded flag surely? For the first alcoholic drink they get a green flag, the second drink gets a blue flag etc. – then "we" will definitely know who to avoid when Mr or Mrs wobbly legs approaches us sideways with their trophy red flag, they are the ones that need to be singled out. Here the ramblings of a pop drinker says the whole “flag the odd one out” should be redefined to put the spotlight on the drinkers for a change, that would be way more fun for us boring fun suckers.  I am joking of course but something to think  about?

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